Better When He's Bad Read online

  She propped her tiny chin on her hand and blinked long lashes at me, despite my grouchy mood and warning look.

  “So what’s up with the hottie in the hotrod? You go get a boyfriend on us?”

  I frowned at her and helped a couple of the little kids with some cereal.

  “No. I don’t have time for a boyfriend. You brats keep me too busy.”

  “He kissed you like he was your boyfriend.” I winced because I forgot they had witnessed that. Reeve chose just that moment to walk in, and I didn’t miss the hard look she gave me.

  “Guys like him . . .” I looked at Blake and purposely avoided Reeve’s glower. “When they kiss you they do it because they want to, not because you’re important or special to them like a girlfriend.”

  She lifted an eyebrow at me, and it was easy to see how far beyond her years she was in the “yeah, right” look she leveled at me.

  “When a guy like that kisses you, it doesn’t matter if you’re important or special. All that matters is that it’s you he’s kissing, and man, was he kissing the shit out of you.”

  “Language!” Reeve’s voice was sharp as I rolled my eyes.

  “It’s not like that. He’s friends with my brother.”

  Blake sighed. “I wish I knew someone that had friends like that.”

  That set all the kids . . . well, the girls, off on a tangent about their dream guys. Even when you grew up hard and had little faith in the world around you, every little girl still wanted her prince to come to her rescue, even if that prince had a star tattooed on his face and charged in under horsepower instead of on a white stallion. I let them chatter and ignored Reeve’s censure, even though it followed me heavily throughout the day.

  I didn’t hear from Bax all day, and I would be lying if I said it didn’t bother me. I would also be damned if I was going to let him know it bugged me that I didn’t hear from him at all that night or the next morning. After we gave the full-time staff the rundown of activities, I was walking out the front door with every intention of seeing if I could con Carmen and the boys into helping me set the apartment back to rights before my classes started in the evening. I couldn’t live in hiding forever, and the sooner I took my life back, the less likely I was to drown in the mystery that was Shane Baxter. I was going to take the bus when Reeve surprised me by asking me if I wanted a ride. Considering her chilly demeanor all weekend, I was hesitant to say yes, but sitting on the bus for a half an hour really wasn’t ever awesome, so I took her up on the offer.

  It only took five minutes before her real motivation became known.

  “Dove.” Her tone was stern and made me look at her. “I know we aren’t friends and I don’t really know anything about you, but I feel like I have to tell you; you need to watch yourself. I don’t think you know what you’re doing getting entangled with a guy like Bax. I know you love Race and believe the best of your brother, but if Bax is the kind of guy he keeps in his inner circle”—she shook her head and her dark hair slashed over her serious face—“you need to be looking out for yourself.”

  I gave her a rueful grin and tucked my hair behind my ears. “I understand where you’re coming from, Reeve, but you don’t know Race and you don’t know Bax, even if his reputation leaves little to be desired. I’ll be okay.”

  “I hope so. Guys like him . . .” She trailed off, and I turned fully in my seat to look at her.

  “You said he would destroy me. I have no intention of letting that happen.”

  “You sleep with him?”

  I stiffened automatically, because like she said, we weren’t even really more than coworkers.

  “Why?”

  “Because you’ve worked at the home for a year and have never even mentioned going on a date with a guy, and yet this guy rolls into your life and all of a sudden you’re rumpled and sucking face in front of the house. That’s what they do . . . make you do things you normally wouldn’t. First it’s sex, and then it’s stuff like drinking or maybe a line of blow, and then the next thing you know, they have you so wound up and backward you’re willing to break the law for them. You turn into a pawn in their game, because, Dovie, that’s all it will ever be to him, a game.”

  “Are you sure you don’t know Bax, Reeve? You sound like you’re speaking from experience.”

  “I told you I don’t know him, but I know of him and I know all about guys like him. I know what it looks like after they’re done with you. It’s ugly and almost impossible to come back from, and I would hate that for you.”

  I would hate that for me too. “I don’t drink, my mom was a junkie, so there isn’t even a slight chance—regardless, if I let him in my pants or not—that Bax is getting me to do blow or anything else. As for the rest . . .” I let my shoulder rise and fall in a careless shrug. “Right now I need him, so I have to take the good with the bad. He doesn’t lie. He doesn’t try and fool me into thinking he’s safe or that he has my best interest at heart. He terrifies me and I tell him that on a pretty regular basis, but he can also be sweet and gentle when he wants to be. I don’t know that I have any other choice but to play the game with him for now. He seems to be the only one that knows how to win it.”

  His words about having the balls to make the wrong choice and being strong enough to deal with the fallout danced through my head.

  “Just keep your eyes peeled, and if anything seems off, run.”

  I nodded, because really, it was sound advice. If I had stayed away, I wouldn’t know what it felt like to have him touch me, to have him move over me with those black eyes burning into my soul. I wouldn’t know what it was like to want.

  In my life I had never had much, never needed much. Sure, once Race came into the picture, things got easier. I felt more comfortable admitting that I wanted things, a family, someone to rely on, security, to finish school and help other people, but I had never wanted the way Bax made me want. Considering the kind of guy he was, that wasn’t only foolish, it was also bound to leave me, just like Reeve said, destroyed.

  We finished the rest of the ride to my apartment complex in silence, her warning hanging heavy between us. I wanted to ask how she knew, what the story was behind her certainty that Bax was everything bad, but I think the reality of it would be too much to bear when I still hadn’t heard from him. I thanked her for the ride and promised I would keep my eyes open and do my best to watch my back. I don’t think she believed me, but as it was in this world, there was nothing more she could do, because I was my own person, bound to make my own mistakes.

  Carmen and the boys were happy to see me and totally willing to help me salvage anything we could out of the trashed apartment. They grilled me about the damage, about Bax, and I had to promise Marco twenty times that I would remind him about the promised ride in the Runner. It took the entire afternoon, and most of my belongings ended up in the rusty Dumpster at the back of the building, but the place was somewhat habitable. I took the boys to McDonald’s for lunch while Carmen got ready for work. I still wasn’t sure about money to replace my books and stuff for school, but I decided I would just have to figure it out.

  I was on the bus headed toward the community college when I finally heard from the boy who had been on my mind for the last two days. I wanted to ignore the message, knew I should call Brysen and ask her if it was okay if I just stayed with her until Race showed his face, but I couldn’t do it. The lure of that devil’s face with the star inked on it was too much.

  I’ll pick you up from the school. I have shit to do tonight though.

  That’s okay. I can stay with Brysen.

  I said I’ll come get you.

  Even though it was a text and not his voice, I could feel the irritation in his response. Maybe he hadn’t been up to no good when I hadn’t heard from him all day Sunday, or maybe he was just horny and keeping it in his pants was making him grouchy. I chewed on my bottom lip and contemplated the best way to handle the situation. I wanted to see him, wanted to be with him, but Reeve’s warning
s about losing myself to him and the game were buzzing around under my skin.

  Okay, but I have school stuff I have to do so whatever stuff you have to do needs to have me back at the house with time to do it.

  You got it, Copper-Top.

  That was it. No making fun of me, no arguing that there would be no time for homework because he would have me otherwise occupied, just you got it. I was never going to be able to predict what this boy was going to come at me with, and I wished that bothered me a whole lot more than it actually did.

  CHAPTER 9

  Bax

  YOU LOOK TERRIBLE, SON.”

  I couldn’t argue with the grizzled old mechanic. My face was still a wreck, my side was healing, but slowly, and there was no refuting that I had repeatedly gotten my ass kicked in the last few days.

  I grunted and reached out to shake Gus’s hand. Everything I had learned about cars I had learned from this old guy. He ran a shop that was the legal front for the chop shop that handled all of Novak’s hot cars. The Runner wouldn’t be half of the beast it was if it wasn’t for Gus. Well, for Gus and for Titus dragging me with him to the shop after school for years before I realized I hated my half brother’s guts. Titus was almost as good with cars as I was. It was really the only thing we had in common; that and we both always looked up to Gus.

  “I’m glad you’re out. Nobody around here appreciates classic American muscle the way you do. I can’t let half the idiots that work for me touch the pre-’76 stuff coming in. They don’t know what they’re doing with it.”

  I laughed a little and took a drag on the smoke that was dangling out of my mouth. I had spent all day Sunday running around trying to put a face to the elusive rich guy Race seemed so obsessed with. I’d had no luck, and I was irritated that I wanted to touch base with Dovie, so I purposely didn’t. I didn’t need some girl floating around in my head, not with all the booby traps and nasty stuff that was already constantly in there. She was just supposed to be fun, an easy way to get my needs met until I got my hands on Race. Unfortunately, that wasn’t a lie I could sell to myself and it was more than my dick that wanted to see her tonight.

  “I ran into Titus, he told me to swing by. He said you might need my help.”

  Gus rubbed his greasy hands on his coveralls and lifted a bushy gray eyebrow at me.

  “You listened to your brother?”

  “Half brother, and no, I was going to swing by and see you when I got a minute anyway. I’ve been busy trying to find Race. You hear from him at all?”

  He grunted and propped his booted feet up on the metal desk in the tiny office. His eyes shifted away from my own. “You need to cut Titus some slack. Man’s gotta work, and just because he does it on the right side of the law doesn’t make your brother a bad guy.”

  I blew out a puff of smoke and crossed my arms over my chest. “You say that until he shuts you down for running a chop shop. It doesn’t matter if we have long-term history and that you’re tied to his family or not . . . he’ll put your ass in jail.”

  “I run a legitimate business, son, and no one can prove otherwise. If Titus could prove it, he would be well within his right to lock me up, just like he did with you. Plus, he saved your ass from going upriver for the rest of your twenties. Maybe you should thank him instead of swinging at him.”

  I snorted. “He ratted me out?”

  “I got eyes, Bax. Titus is a monster, he isn’t gonna get a shiner like that from someone he didn’t let put it there. You wanna get your hands dirty, all aboveboard? I got a Stang, a Nova, a Chevelle, and a Hemi ’Cuda all looking to be rebuilt and polished up. They don’t have a thing to do with Novak. It’s a car guy’s heaven and I’ll pay you well to get them up to your standards. Plus, it’ll be an easier paycheck than letting Nassir use you as a punching bag.”

  I rolled my eyes. “I need to find Race, and I’m not even started on Novak.”

  “That’s not smart, Bax.”

  “It doesn’t need to be. I’m tired of him playing puppet master for the entire Point. Someone needs to take him down, and I don’t have anything to lose.”

  He sighed and closed his eyes so he could rub them.

  “You have a brother by blood and another by choice who would be turned inside out without you. And your mom. Jesus, Bax, what do you think burying you would do to her? She would follow you into the ground.”

  I finished the smoke and put it out on the heel of my boot. I was going to tell him it wasn’t my job to worry about any of that when he went on.

  “And Race, he has that little sister he’s all tied up in now. What about her? You’re gonna bring the house down around a bunch of innocent people, Bax? Not even you are that careless.”

  I frowned at him and shoved my hands in the pockets of my hoodie.

  “What do you know about Dovie?”

  “Race was frantic about her. Seems like his pops let it slip he had a little accident and the mom wouldn’t keep her mouth shut about it. The rich bastard wanted to make the whole mess disappear; typical Hill attitude. Race went crazy. I had never seen the boy like that.”

  “After I got locked up, right?”

  Gus looked at me and stacked his hands on his potbelly.

  “A few weeks before. He was all about getting the girl, making sure she was safe. He was talking like you. Novak would pay, he was tired of Novak pulling strings, then things went south and he disappeared. I don’t know why he brought the girl back here, put her not only in his old man’s face but in Novak’s as well, but he must have had a plan.”

  I couldn’t believe Race knew about Dovie before I went to jail. He had never said anything, never mentioned he was in trouble. It didn’t add up and I didn’t like the way everything was circling back to the redhead.

  “Right before he disappeared, Race was flashing a picture around, asking a bunch of questions about some rich guy. You know anything about it?”

  “Yeah. It’s his old man.”

  I blinked stupidly and rocked back on my heels. “What?”

  Gus kicked his feet off the desk and lumbered to his feet. “Race figured that the only person his old man would’ve asked to handle the dirty work was Novak. He was trying to put the two of them together the second he got back into town.”

  “What exactly are we talking about when we say ‘dirty work,’ Gus?”

  “You know Novak, Bax. What do you think?”

  I swore and followed Gus back into the garage, where welders and air hoses made it impossible to talk. If Race thought his dad had asked Novak to kill Dovie, that made things even worse and more complicated than I thought. What in the hell kind of tangled mess had Race wandered into?

  We stopped by a pile of rust that would be one badass ride with a little work. There was nothing like old muscle. I put a foot up on the bumper.

  “She’s a sweet girl.”

  Gus looked at me out of the corner of his eye and leaned on the fender. “The sister? How do you know?”

  I just lifted an eyebrow, which made him shake his head. “Race is going to kill you. He loves that girl something fierce.”

  “Well, he’s doing a shit job keeping her safe. Benny and his goons are all over her, and I’m the one running interference.”

  “You run interference with what’s in your pants?”

  “I told you she was sweet, and apparently she played a bigger part in Race going to ground than I thought. I need to figure this shit out. It looks like I might have to take a trip up to the Hill.”

  “Be careful. Those people would like nothing more than to put you back behind bars. You took a lot of their really nice stuff.”

  We shared a laugh that had very little humor in it. I pushed off the bumper and pulled my hood up over my face.

  “I’ll help you get the monsters running, but that’s it. I don’t want anything to do with Novak’s business.”

  “I don’t want you anywhere near Novak, Bax. Jail won’t be his answer to dealing with you this time around. Don’t
be stupid, son.”

  We shook hands and I tried to draw a picture in my head of all the info Gus had just given me. Race knew about Dovie. His dad wanted her dead. Old Man Hartman had asked Novak to kill her. Dovie was still around, Race had helped kidnap the old man the night I got arrested, and somehow that was all tied into him coming back to town and subsequently disappearing. He had to have dirt on Novak; something nasty if he felt safe enough coming back to the Point for a whole year before my release. I was starting to think he had purposely waited until I was out, until I was free to make his move, even if I didn’t know what that move was. One thing was clear—I was a pawn in all of it. I had given up five years of my life for someone else’s goal and that just pissed me off. I didn’t like to be used by anyone, ever.

  I was running it over and over again while I drove to the school to get Dovie. She told me just to wait for her in front of the main doors and she would be out at ten sharp. Only she was already waiting for me when I got there, and my blood heated up when she yanked open the door on the opposite side of the car and slammed it shut with way more force than necessary. Her pretty mouth was screwed up in a pout and there was a flush under the freckles on her cheeks. She was upset about something and all I wanted to do was get her naked and play connect the dots.

  “What’s up?”

  She tossed her head back against the seat and fixed her eyes on me. I liked the way the green got darker and deeper when she was feeling something strongly. They did that when I made her come, too.

  “College, even community college, is impossible with no books. I hate that Benny guy, I hate whoever Novak is, and I’m pretty pissed at my brother right now for dragging me into the middle of this.”

  “You need money?”

  I looked at her and she glared at me.

  “Not from you.”

  I made a noise in my throat and tried to remember why I thought I’d missed her the last couple of days. She moved a little and under her baggy plaid shirt I caught a peek of her creamy throat. There was a very visible hickey on the side of it, and it all came back to me in a rush, a rush that made my jeans suddenly too tight.